Jealous competitive friends reddit Theyre very fit and have great figures. I find myself bitingly jealous of anyone who does remotely better than me in anything. I know that can get complicated when it's a friend, a family member, even a coworker you can't get to buzz off. She's positive, cheerful, lovely, hardworking, and sometimes, yes, I do feel jealous of her and competitive. But over the course of the past year, I've realised how competitive she is, to the point she is always trying to pull me down. It is a neurological response to trauma. Capricorn sun Aries moon - I get extremely jealous only if I don’t have someone . I used to have a toxic friend like yours who was inconsiderate, rude, hypocritical, competitive, jealous, disgusting, and egotistic. I'm not usually competitive with my friends but with her I started to be and it got to a point where it bothered me a lot. I obviously don’t know your specific friends, but you are giving the advice that people who aren’t in similar income brackets are jealous of friends in higher income brackets, which isn’t true and kind of pretentious. People grow a lot over 12 years. My best friend is a girl, and we've been good friends for some time. I feel like an asshole but I feel like he would have eventually caused me to be the same way , so I see ur point Several months ago, I was hired for an associate-level role, and at the same time, they hired a 17-year-old intern. I (30M) am not sure why, but I am super competitive regarding friendships with my close guy friends. And I came back and he had made friends with new people along with our other friend, (let's call her Jane). I wouldn't remain friends with them if they So, I have a friend, practicing muslimah, which is one of the reasons why we became friends last year- we're both hijabi students and batchmates so we stuck together. This is when it gets funny. Instead of celebrating your successes, they feel the need to outdo you, turning every interaction into a contest. They look up to me. It's not something I've really experienced as an adult. He got the job because his cousin was a senior developer, and he had been self-learning for four years in addition to his industry knowledge and skills gained from his family's IT background. We are together with bf for ~8 years and this is not the first time that my or our friends achieve something BIG. Well, I can't just accept it. I feel terrible for being so jealous, but in equal measure, I AM jealous. Overall, it is making me super uncomfortable and I am thinking of moving further away from her. I (24f) have been living with a good friend of mine (24f) for a few months after being friends for about 2 years. But here job market is really really competitive! Another thing I have noticed, and this is harsh reality. Actually, just run. My friend, let's call her Emma, has recently taken an interest in baking as well. Sep 23, 2011 · Below are some tips to help you cope with a competitive colleague, friend, or family member. Hey, lately i discovered that I have the most competitive,toxic and jealous friend a What made me realize is an argument, we would always argue and I’d be always the right one but she would never admit that I am, but her not admitting wasn’t an issue to me because I know I’m right and that’s what matters, but 2 weeks ago we had an argument and today she came to me and said oh btw our It's very simple. In Overwatch, I'm too embarrassed to play with randoms, and have almost stopped playing. I’m not saying every person I interact with is jealous of me or anything but I’ve had a lot of people be jealous or weirdly competitive with me when I’m truly just tryna live my life. But some part of me jealous. She sent me 20+ texts with examples from her family friends and whatnot and how they changed their careers form medicine to shit like psych, law blah blah WHICH ARE GREAT! GOOD FOR THEM! BUT SHE IS LITERALLY LYING + only saying these to put me off. It sounds like you've been through a lot with your friend over the years, and while the competition is fierce, it's understandable that you want to keep the friendship. Yes it happened to me. I want to clarify that the jealousy isn't romantic, I am also jealous imagining close friends replacing me with someone new. I don't understand why Kate can't have nice things, get a makeup artist and hair stylist, and make some nice looking photos without other moms getting all jealous and hateful about it. I didn't like the person I was around her. At a certain level, it is a normal means of bonding with other people. Fuck that! Promotions and demotions can significantly alter your living standard, making employees more competitive and jealous. O. But then if I suspect they’re jealous, I also have this internal reaction to hate them for not being happy I’m not one to think one is jealous of me. Business, Economics, and Finance. She passed 18 years ago and I still miss her very much. Yes, I am hard working and very competitive and physically active. There is nothing inherently wrong with feeling jealous. I won't. But I was happy we talked about it. I think one of the most egregious moment in my “art school friend group” was one of them taking up space in the main hall that the professors had specifically spaced out for me because that person wanted to showcase e My best friend has been acting jealous and competitive with me and excluded me from plans with my other friend this weekend So I have these two close friends: one is my best friend, and the other is also a close friend, and I have been individually friends with them both for 3+ years. Competitive friends are not a part of levelling up. She was the popular one, she could get any boy she wanted, she had friends. Has anybody had the experience of their friends backing away from hanging out, or being visibly and/or audibly jealous of… bro i have also noticed a pattern of me being friends with only the people who are jealous of me, theyre the kinda people who will criticise ur evry action but then they are then the same version of like 10mins later,theyll talk behind ur talk all the time and wont be hesitant to say something to ur face and then do the same things exactly the This is the official community for Genshin Impact (原神), the latest open-world action RPG from HoYoverse. High and High school years so social media and more specifically, Art Social media, seemed like the perfect place for someone like me to try and make friends as well as share my art and interact with other artists & art lovers. congrats! and i think ACs were raised being compared to others so we grew up continuing to compare and feel jealous when we aren’t doing “good enough”. Not complaints necessarily. I just wish people would understand that you can have trauma without having PTSD. I’m not going to be jealous of another woman for having a boyfriend, that doesn’t make any sense to me. Recently, Emma has been asking me to share my baking recipes with her. EDIT: Since I am noticing this in the comments, I really don't resent or have any ill feelings towards the people I'm jealous of, it's just a panic of losing something, and I get pretty down on myself. However, I was talking to a female acquaintance of mine, and she was saying she felt bad for being jealous about a mutual friend's new project. AskWomen: A subreddit dedicated to asking women questions about their thoughts, lives, and experiences… Maybe spend more time around your friends and their good parents. Friends are people you trust and that you want to be a part of your life. Taken too far as your friend is doing, It is unsettling, and can be a sign if a personality disorder such as borderline. Me and my friend (both 17F) are close, but sometimes I get jealous of her. I am 34 and I was social looser for all my life. I have an arsenal of extracurricular, volunteering, and AP/honors classes. That I needed time. Robbed of “my thing”, my “plan B”. The thing that bothers me is that im not jealous of the models, cause i know those pictures are edited. but some emotions aren't worth giving the time to engage with, and envy is one of those. It’s like I demand 100% loyalty from friends and if I notice one slip up then I mentally distance myself hardcore. If you feel jealous, that doesn't make you "that person" unless you act on the jealousy (for example, trying to downplay others' accomplishments). If I as much as talk to my daughter she would call me every few minutes. My friend just announced she can do commissions for her art after getting help setting up PayPal with help from a friend I don't know, well I do feel happy for her of course. I've actually seen a phenomenon that's a little bit of an upside down version of this It's basically when a wannabe entrepreneur starts bragging and showing off and so the friends get turned off by it and may say something negative, that's when the wannabe thinks that the friends are just being jealous. And breast enlargement IS the most common cosmetic surgery procedure. I told a few close friends about it, some of whom also share class with C and me. I’ve dropped my jealous friends because their insecurity gets projected onto me for literally no reason. He came off as nice and stuff , but the more I hung out with him , I notice how bitter and jealous and competitive he was and I cut him off. Her ex introduced us, so I’ve always known her in a relationship, but I’m learning that she can be a bit competitive when single… You say your friend is living the life you want to lead, but you also say that you don’t know what you want. I’m also not going to show off my boyfriend, he’s not a trophy. It’s hard to stay happy for them but I try. Girls my age are competitive which I find eternally baffling because I don't consider myself in competition with them. I feel like I am constantly trying to one up my cousins or family friends. So, you are feeling jealous because you want what your friends have. our worth has been measured by our accomplishments and external successes our whole lives. We're always competing with eachother (sometimes it feels pretty unhealthy and some mistrust developes between us), and whoever "loses" always feels inferior. The way I saw it was that I wasn't interested in pursuing them again, and I guess it boosted her self-confidence. How do you manage players that are hyper competitive and/or a poor loser? Example: I played a game of Catan with some friends including player A (the competitive one. feel close and comfortable with the same people. Of course, there are other people I know, but they are close acquaintances at the most. In Siege I can help without it showing on the scoreboard, in Overwatch it's clear. Her friend chimed in too and the whole ordeal just completely shocked me to my core. I don't think it's SUPER competitive, but sometimes I get "I wish my boobs were as big as yours". I'm honestly scared of ending up in another dynamic like this one. I (22F) am a college student, and I have one single friend in all of college. Here are some examples: —Kaye’s friend at work put up two Christmas trees this year: one little one and a bigger one. My boyfriend told me the only thing holding him back from hooking up with his female friends is the fact that they’re dating his male best friends. 158 votes, 151 comments. When i look at them, they never really look bad to me. If friend B is closer to friend C than me, it bothers me. My best friend and I have our issues. It is a practice in yoga and meditation to 'observe' your thoughts and feelings, as if watching clouds float by in the sky. One thing about her however has made me realise toxic traits about myself so now when talking with friends I'm more conscious of where I interject etc. So, I have a friend who is really competitive, they don’t like to admit they are but… they are. I've shared a few basic ones, but when it comes to my signature recipes, I'm hesitant. But the person you are jealous of probably has nothing to do with the conditions of your life. I hated feeling jealous when my friend was talking so excitedly about her spring break trip. Friends who are never just 100% supportive of your positive life changes but are super ready to commiserate with you when your life isn't up to par. Crypto 45M subscribers in the AskReddit community. Posted by u/Localmember - 2 votes and 2 comments I feel like my friends are jealous of me and have been for years, which may have led to the conflicts I have mentioned in the past. Even if they're a friend or family member who I have no reason to bear any hostility towards, once they succeed in something I also want to be great at, I peg them as a rival and have a hard time congratulating them/discussing the particular activity with them. Tl,dr: My introvert ass has only one close friend and she's kinda jealous of me. Aug 23, 2024 · When a friend is excessively competitive, it might be because they see your achievements as a threat to their own self-worth. Ima say from the other perspective. I feel like I am not truly connected with anyone due to this. You can polite and cordial, but you'd be foolish to trust them. I can't tell if she means to put me down or if i'm just being too sensitive or something. 5M subscribers in the AskWomen community. Issues only arise from jealousy if you choose to react openly and negatively to your jealous feelings. Genuinely I do. Instead of being consumed by the green eyed monster you need to use your desire to have what your friends have to propel you to get those things for yourself. There was another thread on r/childfree about a woman who had pottytrained her 9 month old and posted about it. OP, you need to dump this "friend" because that's not what friends do. 130K subscribers in the AskAstrologers community. I never experienced that before, I was always the ugly duckling during my school years. Run! She's dangerous. I was quite surprised since this acquaintance is quite lovely, attractive, and successful and started her own niche business, but apparently she felt jealous if any of her friends started a new project Well, I don’t really have any advice other than being on the receiving end like your friend. We stopped talking for 2 years and only reconnected because our kids are similar in age. In this way, you can use jealousy to inspire/motivate you and then it becomes this great thing instead of this awful 5. I can't tell you which it is, you know your friends, we don't. This is called mirroring. My friend who got fired, it's easy to see why any man could be jealous of this guy. g. I had a best friend who went after every single one of my exes. They look great, and are obviously not edited lol. I can relate to you hardcore right now. But you know what? She is always there for me, always cheering me on. Over time as I've had better success with girlfriends, we've altered how we act around each other and consider our time together, but we're still best friends. . Even if this was a complaint, people here are correcting OP's definition of competitive and positive people. I was the kid who would get my test back in class and immediately turn it over or stuff it in my backpack before others saw and gave me crap for my high score. a LITERAL energy vampire. I’m far from the worst off of my friends and I’m sure there’s things that I have that others might be jealous of. My best female friends are 10 to fifteen years older than me. But now I just get this weird feelings like she's trying to keep up with me. It took me a while to realise that she must have been deeply jealous of me. I didn't care, really, as I have never been the jealous type. Second, the lack of work/life balance paired with a group socialization upbringing makes it difficult to separate colleagues from friends and family, which fosters quite a lot of gossip and makes people tendentious to take Thinking back, my late mentally ill nmom was jealous of her children having friends, having a romantic relationship, or having a good relationship with other grown ups, so she tried to control everything and attack my relationships with other people everything under the disguise that she is only doing this because she is a good mom :( Maybe I'm being a bit jealous but I do support her with the project and offer my help. She was always competitive and comparing us though. We're still both in highschool but I don't know why I'm taking this serious. I had a couple of friends jealous of me getting an MD and wanted me to fail. My best friend just won an esteemed prize for his work and I should be happy for him, but i'm not. PTSD does not mean 'worse trauma'. Even if I am laughing with a male friend about random bullshit, their girlfriend will always be standing by shooting me evil looks. Maybe its all in my head and im overthinking! Lately my intutitom has been telling me a friend is a lil jealous about my future goals/plans but i dont want to think they are in case they arent. For example, if my friend A (29M) seems closer to B than I am, it really bothers me. I’m someone who values keeping the peace and fostering open and safe environments for my friends. I beat them at chess, they sulk about it. Idk she's so darn competitive I want to slap her so bad. Idk why but i feel people are jealous sometimes esp close friends when im really passionate. If you're the kind of person who learns better through competition (I know I am), then it's okay to be competitive. I recently left for college fall 2022. I started doing competitive programing around 5 years ago when I just got admitted to university. true. I ask all the time why they play with me. If you start feeling jealous about something, observe that I've got lots of friends who are overweight and live fairly sedentary lives. That kind of thing was really only an issue in middle school/high school for me because in didn't have as much freedom of choice in my friendships. Dealing with competitive or jealous friends is definitely a challenge, so I totally get where you're coming from. I think this is key here. When we first became friends, we had our own interests and separate strengths and she never put me down. Somehow manage your jealousy or ghost your friend quietly. I can clearly see her getting jealous but I wonder whether she wants my attention or she just feels jealous that me and my daughter is developing a bond which she never could. Long story short, I’m in uni and got a friend that doing the same degrees as me and we has always chose to be in the same class. Jane and I play music together a little because we are both pretty musically inclined. Whenever there is test or exam, she always get slightly better than me, though overall we got same letter grade (A+), she will always get sth like 97/100 while i get 95/100. Oh I forgot a funny anecdote- my friends invented a character to deal with my obnoxiousness- her name was “(my real first name) Shakespeare,” and she was just like me except a lot better in every single area- much smarter, astoundingly talented, much prettier, much funnier, much kinder, much more generous, just super effortlessly great and 167 votes, 31 comments. I say this coming from someone who was once jealous, possessive, and vindictive, as a product of the narcissistic parent in my life. I do have imposter syndrome so I said I guess it wasn’t that competitive. I feel like I have this same problem. Long story short, I was always a very timid and shy person and had a very hard time making friends IRL during my Jr. Carmela loves Furio and can't be with him, dropped out of school and is a stay at home mom, and her only friends are just like her. We've had a friendly relationship, but Emma has always been quite competitive. Law school IS competitive. I see this with a few friends, one in particular who just lost a job he had for years due to his new boss having mad jealousy for him. I hate feeling bitter when another friend complains about something she doesn’t like about the model of car her parents paid for. Maybe their parents will understand your situation Jealousy isn't healthy. My ex and I used to point out how good of asses girls we saw in public had. I mean, all my childhood friends have it all i ever wanted, also my teenage friends and now my adult friends aswell. The women I'm friends with as an adult aren't jealous, competitive, or mean to each other at all. And I felt very jealous of those people who were same age as me but very good at competitive programming! Because, they started 5-6 years earlier than me! But, that didn't stop me from solving problems! My friend, is a total badass. I had been jealous of her for multiple years. For example she received expensive concert tickets along with airplane tickets to a foreign country for the summer. Competitive friend is so draining For context, I've been on off friends with this girl since 2012, we initially met through mutual friends who I used to party with, and back then she wasn't too bad. I hate PDA or doing things that might make others uncomfortable. No and it’s one of the many reasons I no longer do it for work. I came back and he had learned piano room voice lessons, and was trying to write music. The game features a massive, gorgeous map, an elaborate elemental combat system, engaging storyline & characters, co-op game mode, soothing soundtrack, and much more for you to explore! Today I found out that a friend of mine attempted suicide lately and instead of feeling guilt or sadness, I felt weirdly jealous. Carmela is incredibly jealous of her, because she is happily in love and has interesting friends while living in NYC and getting a real education. Recently, I got accepted into a competitive college. The people im jealous of are my IRL friends and acquantances. I don’t trust them, and I also want to make others jealous. I don't know what to do. Only certain friends trigger this competitive, jealous and possessive behavior. I make an advancement in a game we’re playing together, they seem upset because I got it first etc. If the speak poorly of you and don't think we'll of you, they should not be considered a friend. I have dozens of stories, but i just need to get my heaviest ones off my chest, maybe it'd help. I was jealous over my friends who had girlfriends, one night stands, being desired by women, had social and funny teen and 20s life. I stay close to people who are happy when I do well, and I am happy when they do well. I don't think that's "competitive" or "jealous", it's just that everybody has something about their own body that they dislike, and boobs just tend to be one of those things. Either your friend has incredibly deep insecurities that are ruining her entire life, or it's not jealous friends you need to be worried about, it's your behavior around your friends. If it becomes a pattern , though, then I reconsider and potentially end the friendship because I don't enjoy being in constant competition with any of my friends. I was an antisocial kid, who to this day (Im 19) has not had a bf. When you hesitate to share your good news with them, that's when you know your friendship isn't real. If it's one of "her" friends, as in, someone that isn't really close with me the way they are with her, then this can and does make me really jealous. Do you want the life of your friend because it is considered ”successful”, or because their life is in alignment of your values? You need to know who you are and what your values are. I was jealous for a long time and I honestly still am a My friend seems to be jealous/competitive of my PTSD and it's making me want to shake her. You know, the friends that are super nice and accommodating to you in private, but are so ready to make a fool out of you in front of others for their own benefit. It's a good thing you live in different states. I have 4 such friends 😂 and I am jealous as hell! Not that I m getting paid less but they are getting paid little too much. If i’m in a relationship, and i trust them (as i should) i don’t get jealous. basically i made a new « friend » at school,let’s call her chloe , and she turned out to be overly competitive (so competitive that it’s just ridiculous), jealous and a huge attention seeker and just literally insufferable. They weren't jealous; I was just annoying. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. Had a friend like her, we were like sisters from college until a decade later. I get that, I'm sure a lot of people do. Posted by u/Fickle_Turnover_9811 - 1 vote and 2 comments They taught me to be jealous and competitive instead of being happy for their achievements or provide a helping hand when needed. I have dealt with a lot of "friends" situations when I get some good news, they weren't happy at all and when I told them about the difficulties I have been facing, I could see the satisfaction on their faces when they see me suffering. Kaye is competitive in so many aspects of her life, not just work but peer, family, and friend. I had a really messy sloppy ending with those toxic 7+ year friendships. I’ve had multiple friends/ co workers who were jealous of me Even my old boss. Be kind but from a distance. Unfortunately, news kind of spread a little bit, and now, people who I'm not really close with, including C, found out. A community for asking questions about your birth chart or astrology in general. People have different goals and not all of them revolve around career and money. I’m a F25 and I let this guy 31M befriend me at my old job. Have you ever felt this feeling? I got jealous of someone's art and that jealousy turns into sadness likeBecause I have this friend that I was the one who taught them how to draw and then they started getting better and better even better than me. But the moral there isn't to avoid letting your friends be funny around a guy, it's to make sure you and your S. i recently responded in another post about how much work i have to put in to NOT compare myself to others and feel jealous and competitive. So beating jealousy and competitiveness has two components: What type of people are you hanging around? Are your friends really your friends? 146 votes, 53 comments. Yes, I have lost friends over the years I think due to this and it's sad because it's the last thing I want. , friends vs work), the cost of Aug 23, 2024 · When a friend is excessively competitive, it might be because they see your achievements as a threat to their own self-worth. OP's obviously referring to toxic competitive people then slowly directing it to competitive people as a whole because he cant handle people having their own way. First thing first, Ive been in a kinda similar position as you. my bf That she was jealous of our friendship. They are being competitive toward you, they don't want you to be better than them, they try hard to prevent you from improving yourself so that you won't be better than them, they want your life to be worse than theirs, they don't want you to have hopes or life purposes, they want you to be more miserable than them I don't sweat when a friend tells me they're jealous of something in my life or when they make the occasional shady comment. I'm very competitive with myself, but not at all with other people. Two people can go through one event, and one can come out with PTSD and the other might not. It seems to indicate that your friend lacks a stable sense of identity, so she needs to take on another's. GameStop Moderna Pfizer Johnson & Johnson AstraZeneca Walgreens Best Buy Novavax SpaceX Tesla. Also if they act like they don’t admire me in any way. This happened to me ~4 months ago and the "friend"/roomate actually came on this subreddit to speak ill about me and express how she was jealous of the opportunities I've gotten, you aren't alone in this! This place is for unpopular opinions. I really need advice. She has more friends, goes to parties a lot with her boyfriend while I dont have many friends. I have a very close friend who I adore as a person but she has had a bad habit of making everything into a competition or simply one upping/doing the same things as me in an attempt to “prove that she can do it too”. People who receive jealousy often have a lot to be jealous of. The best strategy to use depends on what the situation is (e. I grew up, acting just like her because she was my example. I told her I was surprised I got it and I was very close to not applying since it’d be competitive. It's weird because sometimes she's the bestest friend and so supportive of me. She used to get jealous of stuff like this. When I lost 40-ish pounds through diet/exercise, I thought they were jealous of me, but what I realized is that my huge change in lifestyle may have come with some self-righteousness that, intended or not, came across to them. Be competitive. However, the other day I told my friend that I received a fellowship that would award me 20k for grad school. They taught me to tear down the competition instead of complimenting my own family. My advicepull back. Almost all my friends are plat and above, and I'm an impatient silver with ADHD. Your friend knows, if he's doing 1/4 of your healing. Anyways, I am trying to upscale my skills to get better job. She asked me if we could be friends again like we were and I told her I miss her as my friend but I can’t trust her again like that. That I was HER friend and I should be her best friend again. Not really of the attention they’re getting or the medical care but I felt robbed somehow. vidzef hvalu bhivekc qyuwhivr azk xplu kpk hbt vjf xtq